I was born with a charitable heart. I have gone on countless mission trips, fed the homeless, and helped a neighbor, family member, or friend. “Pay it forward” is my motto! Anyone who knows me understands I give to the homeless and help the needy. I always get my meal halved to give it away as I leave the restaurant. It was my favorite thing to do; help another human in any way until it wasn’t.
It has been 153 days since I filed the initial “Notice of Eviction” with the courts. Wednesday, a total of 160 days will have passed before the order will finally be enforced. At least that is what the sheriff said when he called to “make an appt.” to implement the eviction and remove the squatter! This person has terrorized me and my family for the last FIVE months. It literally makes me question my sanity. I ask it when I re-tell what the police officers who frequent my home have said. I also question it when I re-tell what the Sheriff, who is finally enforcing the Eviction, has said.
Over the last five months of my life, my daughter’s boyfriend has destroyed the compassion that I was born with. Well, not only him altogether; a few others have soured my sweetness, but that’s for another day. He had lived here for over three years before the last one hundred and fifty-plus days.
My daughter met him in high school, and he was her first love, so when he reached out, I was happy for her. She had been through a very sad breakup, and I thought reuniting with your childhood sweetheart was just about the sweetest love story ever! We never dreamed it would turn into our worst nightmare.
In the three years leading up to the eviction I mentored and helped him; I wanted to “fix” him. That’s what I do, or at least I try. I was his youth leader when he was in high school, and I wanted so badly to mold him into a BOSS! He barely worked but was very helpful around the house and willing to help me with anything, so he stayed. Then, finally, in the spring of this year, he got a job he liked and started making money. I set a fair rental payment, and he did well for about three months.
During that time, my other daughter moved back in, and she and the “Renter” were actually friends since they all went to school together. For whatever reason, they started fighting, and he didn’t want the sisters to even hang out with each other. He decided to tell me, through my daughter, that if my daughter didn’t have to pay rent or clean, he didn’t either. The Battle has begun!
That day he decided he would not pay rent unless my daughter did. This is my house; you are NOT on the lease, you do not pay one dime for her living expenses. It is not your business who pays what, or what I allow in my home. It is YOUR responsibility as a man to pay for your own food and living expenses. Embark on the merry-go-round.
The fighting with both daughters got really bad. He treats the daughter he dates like garbage and terrorizes the other one. “It’s not fair he has to work and not pay.” The name-calling was terrible, vandalizing the house, and the screaming and threats got so bad that the police were called. The officer advised me to evict him to get him out.
I asked him to leave, but he didn’t have to. This is a TRUE story. I would try not to engage, but I was over it after a few weeks. I stood outside the bedroom with a pot and pan and chanted, “If you don’t pay, you don’t sleep.” He called the police on me and laughed about it. They instructed me I could NOT do that and again told me to evict him. Over the next month or so, police were called for various reasons and not always from this house, and they did nothing.
The “Renter” has kicked in doors, ripped the frames off the walls, spray painted “eff you whores” on the walls; SPRAY PAINTED! Again, the officer says ‘domestic,” you have to evict him. WHAT!! I am just dumbfounded. It has escalated to threats; he has thrown food on my daughter, slapped her drinks and food from her hands, and SPIT on her. He told her the only way she was leaving him was in a body bag! Yet, NONE of these terrible things did the police deem criminal or unsafe for me, my two girls, or the four-year-old. I am amazed.
I have had things stolen and broken, and my finances affected. He eats our food and drinks the last cup of milk instead of leaving it for the baby. I am just blown away that the legal system protects vagrants more than a tax-paying homeowner. Squatters have more legal protection and rights than we do!! I am very independent and pride myself in caring for myself, and “I do not need a man to take care of me.” Yes, that is a direct quote that I have now amended. “I do not need a man to provide for me,” but, let’s face it, if a man were living here and told the “renter” to leave, he would.
I stopped going downstairs, I practically stopped paying for food, I would flip the breaker to the room, I literally did everything short of a gun to the face to make him leave, and he said NO.
I still am in shock at the fact that all of these things have been told to the police, and I can not get help. I have no legal right to have a person removed who is terrorizing my whole family and destroying property! He has been permitted to stay despite it all, and ALL three of us have told him to leave.
Even though he DOES NOT get mail here, nor is he on a lease, I have to evict him. Well, how do you EVICT an unwanted vagrant? The legal system calls this an “Unlawful detainer.” This is no easy task.
- Step 1: You must write a letter to the unwanted person to leave. (wait for the mandated allotted time to continue then;)
- Step 2: You must file a complaint and pay a fee; you heard it, kids—it’s not free. The cost is just over 300 dollars. It takes hours to fill out the paperwork. You also need to write up the motions and file the complaint. After the complaint, you must wait for the judge to sign, and the court assigns you a CASE NUMBER.
- Step 3: File a summons. This is basically a formal version of step one, and you have to pay for the sheriff to process it. AKA, serve it. (Wait the required time for the Defendant to respond.)
- Step 4: Get an Affidavit signed and notarized to attest to “Non-military status.” (notary fee)
- Step 5: File a Motion of Default and wait for the judge to sign off,
- Step 6: File a default, wait
- Step 7: File a Motion for Final judgment and wait for the Judge to sign
- Step 8: File Final Judgment; Wait for the Judge to sign off (this tells “the defendant” Hey, you lose; GET OUT! I won, but doesn’t make them leave.
- Step 9: File for “Writ of Possession.” This is supposedly the golden ticket; it is a command to the sheriff to serve the “Defendant” again and give them 24 hours to leave before the sheriff comes back to do it.
THIS IS HYSTERICAL! So, I watched the Case online several times a day, waiting for the writ to see this document I needed so badly. Finally, I saw it; this nightmare is OVER! LOL. Days go by, and NOTHING. I finally called the right number, and I got a call that they had indeed posted the “WRIT” two days ago. No one ever saw it!
I guess the “defendant” got to it and took it down. ANYWAYS, the sheriff said, “I know it says 24 hours. However, there are only 4 of us for all of Duval County.” I see the urgency, so I bumped you up, and we can make an appointment to come Wednesday at 12:30.” This is 6 days from the day of the call. WHAT!!!!
I began to explain to the sheriff how bad it’s been here. I pleaded about all the horrible things going on. It has gotten much worse. He said, and I quote, “I suggest you, your daughter, and the baby go to a HOMELESS Shelter.” He added, “until we get this done!” Literally, this is ALL TRUE! I can not believe what I am hearing!! I can not make this up.
The main idea of this information is clear. Anyone you allow to stay in your home can do this to you, too! Be careful to whom you extend a helping hand, and realize that times are desperate.
Domestic violence is genuinely devasting for women! It is the number ONE cause of injury to women, above accidents, stranger violence, and self-harm. Reaching out for help while the offender is allowed to stay or come back repeatedly is a life-and-death situation. The time it takes to get a permanent solution is critical. Some cases can take up to ONE year to finalize. It took me 5 months! More than one-third of domestic violence deaths have been reported before.
I literally was so mad one night I even told the officer that call number 17 will be someone hurt or dead. Was it going to come down to the “stand your ground” law to get him out of there.”? I literally threatened him directly to the officer, and he did nothing!
Women need to be protected when necessary; less than half bother to report at all for fear of retaliation, threats, or fear of going to jail themselves. Society is broken and desperate, and it’s getting worse each year. Please be mindful when you open your home; you do not want to get caught up in this situation. Unless something else happens, assume Wednesday the case has been resolved. Stay safe, and if you are in an abusive situation, don’t let it go on until you or a family member gets hurt. Don’t allow someone to take advantage of you and your kindness!
Good luck and be safe,
Christy Walker
https://www.thehotline.org/get-help/
https://www.jud12.flcourts.org/Services/Self-Help-Center/Unlawful-Detainer/Instructions
JaxBeachHippie 